Hidden from the World

It's 2:30 in the morning and I can't sleep. I have to wake up at 6:30 and I absolutely despise not getting enough sleep at night. I just don't function when I'm tired, or maybe it's all in my head and I just tell myself I can't. It's one of those nights where I can't get my brain to shut off. There is so much to think about and it just absolutely refuses to go to bed, so here I sit. I wish at times I could be more free in my writing. I get so concerned about letting too much of myself out for others to see. There's so much going on in my life that I wish I could just express it all right now. How therapeutic that would be, but I can't bring myself to expose that much of my heart. I know if I learned to open up more, things would be different, but it's just not in my nature. I so appreciate those people in my life who can understand me without me having to tell them anything. What a special bond it creates in my life and one that is desperately needed. Although the number of those people are few, the effects are huge. It's an ongoing battle within myself to express my thoughts and feelings freely or to keep them hidden away safe from the world. Someday I'll win that battle I hope. I'm fixing things in my life right now. Hopefully I can find peace and I will being able to sleep at night once more.